Chozo Wisely

click to enlarge

If you had to form a 3-8 person party (including yourself) out of these 88, who would you bring?

You’re expecting not only combat on this adventure, but negotiations, ancient puzzles, traps and obstacles, and a decent amount of travel.

rolled 83, 27, 88

Actually had a lot of fun coming up with folks. Rolled again and got 62, 59, 56, 12, 18, which had too many freaks in it. I like freaky characters and all, but my inner-editor needs more human characters for the idiot audience to relate to.

There we go. Much better.

Boys are stronger than girls?

PUH-LEASE
Can you bleed for a week and survive?
Can you squeeze 14 inch baby from a 9 centimeter hole?
Can you carry a 7 pound baby in your stomach for 9 months?
Can you take care of a child, cook, clean, and talk on the phone atonce?
Can you carry 10 8 pound shopping bags?
Can you go a week only eating salad?
Can you face heartbreak?
Can you watch the love of your life be with someone else?
Can you burn your forehead with a straightener and not complain

Didn’t think so.

The only thing I’d ever allow my girlfriend to do by herself is sit on the couch… that’s the only thing she can’t screw up without supervision… and if she gets bored I usually take the batteries out of the remote, that way she won’t ruin the TV playing with the remote in the couch where she’s allowed to stay by herself without supervision.

Someone wanted to see the full version of this. I forgot who. Click to see.

http://seventhsanctum.com/generate.php?Genname=darkritual

You are the BBEG how screwed is the world?

Conjuration of the Profane Monster of Wickedness

Pretty screwed, looks like.

Lets get a real life roleplaying thread going! Times in your life that you are so fucking sure you were a PC and everyone else is a NPC.

>wake up in hospital

>nobody is around
>don’t remember how I got there
>look at the clock
>”Oh, it’s two-thirty-two in the morning, if I sleep another eight hours there will be people here.”
>back to sleep
>wake up at exactly 10:32AM
>Doctor is there, old guy, holding a clipboard in his right hand and left hand behind his back
>”what is your name?”

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

>I say Dicks

post your favorite…

Favorite comic:
Preacher

Favorite web comic:
Minus

Favorite cartoon:
Darkwing Duck

Favorite movie:
Attack the Gas Station

Favorite TV series:
My So-Called Life

Favorite Anime series:
Speed Grapher

Favorite book:
The Princess Bride

Favorite video game:
Planescape: Torment (I haven’t gamed in a long time, though, this is just the last thing I remember enjoying.)

Actually I could have probably thought harder on a lot of those, but fuck it.

If Samurai Jack was real and asked to have gay sex with you, would you accept?

If he’s a real person, is he still voiced by a black guy?

And is Aku a real black man, still voiced by a Chinaman?

IF SO: maybe. Because that means Mako’s voice lives on, and that gets me pretty hard.

say you are creating a brand new setting of your own devising.

What five races would you choose to include in this setting?

Gargoyles
Dwarves
Ant-men
Dire-wasps
Owlbears

Choose wisely, You may only pick one.

Toadstool has dimensional portals and that’s kinda neat. If her name is Peach, however: STRAIGHT TO THE BOTTOM OF THE LIST.

If Zelda turns into a dude when she Sheiks, I would be okay with that as well…

I choose Samus.

She has a spaceship, and that’s all I’ve ever asked of a woman.

Popularity: 15% [?]

feels so good man

Write a story in ten words or less.

I didn’t want to go with, but we all died.

I had two stacked, so I just used both since they’re by the same author:

“he was determined,”
“streets of Boston,”

(William Goldman: The Princess Bride; The Temple of Gold, respectively.)

click to enlarge

So answer me this: If you are heading for battle and can chose one weapon and one armor set, which ones would you chose and why?

Axe and plate, sell plate, enchant axe with armor money.

Halberd and plate, sell both, buy spell components.

I wasn’t told what class I’m playing, I don’t want to buy spell components if I can’t cast anything y’know?

That’s a little too real-life for me.

If you could turn an American TV show into anime, which one would it be?

Twin Peaks.

Maybe Freaks & Geeks.

Lost the template. Oh well.

Holy shit. I am my own sitcom/shōnen series cast.

being fit is kinda gay sometimes chunky friends will compare our arms and mine is like in inch bigger then his he says “not bad considering i dont work out huh?” i tell him part of the size of his arm is fat he gets pissed off and tells me to stop being cocky then skinny friends try and brag about there fatless body then they get pissed when i say they are also muscleless wtf? /fit/ should i just get ing shape friends?

tl;dr- why are fat/really skinny people sensitive douches?

If you never experience DOMS, your pain threshold never goes up, and silly things like WORDS hurt.

A nigger points a gun at you in an alley and forces you to have sex with one Disney prince/Hero

who would you choose?

Pick one!

BREAKING IT DOWN BY ROWS:

Eric > Aladdin

Naveen < Shang

Phillip > Tarzan (I LOVE Tarzan; I HATE dreadlocks. Sorry!)

Charming < Adam (since he’s not in Beastmode…)

Zyzz > Tiny [but both are disqualified]

ROUND TWO:

Eric > Shang

Phillip > Adam

Eric and Shang are, I think, pretty evenly matched. Eric has definitely ACCOMPLISHED more, and is prettier. And he didn’t totally beta-out when he found out his chick was a fish, either. Shang flipped shit when he found out his mancrush was a reverse-trap. Sad.

Phillip don’t take shit from sorceresses. Adam can’t say the same. Failure. (Adam would have been a better match-up with Tarzan, since they both fucked up bravado men-of-action. Adam would still lose, though. Tarzan wrestle gorilla, Tarzan stylin’ on Beast.)

FINAL ROUND:

Eric > Phillip

I love Maleficent. I really do. But she just does not hold a candle to the stage presence of Ursula. And that’s really how their respective battles looked: Phillip is on a stage, we see the two great powers (jealousy and true love) clash, and a power move wins the day.

While Prince Eric has clearly just gotten off a Die Hard kick. He’s on a boat and doesn’t afraid of anything. Only Hercules had foes in greater scale (and number of them, at that) but Eric hasn’t got any powers and sorely-limited magical assistance, just a couple levels in Badass and Refusal To Take Shit perks.

I’d tap that.

I want to know how YOU clean yourself after a bowel movement.

Do you use TP, damp TP, soap, a bidet/sprayer, etc.

As well as wiping technique, standing/sitting, folded/wadded, do you clean inside, and so on.

I just use my fingers, digging in with whichever finger I’ve extracted my fingernail from that halfmonth and circling in either a clockwise (left hand) or counter-clockwise (right hand) motion to scrape the inside of my anus with my finger.

Then I curl the finger slightly and extract the scraped-wall shit and either flick it into the toilet, if it doesn’t just slide down into my palm, or scrape it on the underside of the seat. I lift the seat somewhat to allow more storage space. I squat.

It helps me to remember to wash my hands before I leave, though sometimes I use the sink to wash out my butthole (same procedure only now with slightly warm water), and in those cases I’m tired of using the sink after all that work and I just leave it like that.

Popularity: 3% [?]

Contributan

I have no idea why I wanted to save any of this… but we’re at-past 600 words, so I’m posting it.

post your 3 favourite tv shows, your sex, age, and tv show you’re looking forward to the most.

1. Twin Peaks
2. John From Cincinnati
3. Pushing Daisies

Male, 20, interested in anything that gets canceled as quickly as possible.

What’s the most embarrassing anime related thing to happen to you?

I was housesitting for my best friend once while his family was in Cali for his dad’s family reunion. Thinking I was alone, I immediately slept in his sister’s bed naked.

I woke up because I smelled BREAKFAST, but it was still dark.

I went in the kitchen and his mom was making waffles in nothing but an apron.

They were good waffles.

Lets see what kind of people we’ve got on /fit/

Click to enlarge.

We draw our current characters poorly in MS paint.

I don't have MSPaint, so I did this as crudely as possible in GIMP...

I play a rock in GURPS.

Our party recently was turned into unicorns after having a tea party with werebears. The tea turns things into unicorns UNLESS the drinker is already a shapeshifter, in which case it just tastes really bad.

So the werebears weren’t able to drink it, but that’s okay, because they really only bait other people into BECOMING unicorns, so that they may feast on unicorn flesh and perpetuate their godlike constitutions.

We actually have a shapeshifter in our party, who really wanted to be a unicorn and got pissed off that the tea doesn’t work for him/her, so he/she threw my character at the teapot in a fit of rage.

Thus turning my character into a rockcorn.

Why do people get so upset about George Lucas making changes to the original Star Wars movies?

As a lore geek, I appreciate the changes and things he adds since it adds to the canon and that’s the kind of stuff I enjoy. I just don’t understand what rubs people the wrong way about that. It’s more Star Wars! Awesome!

Because I had the original version on VHS, and when my mom destroyed them because she wanted me to suffer, my childhood burned away with those tapes.

post stats as you feel represent you

STR: 9
DEX: 11
CON: 8
INT: 10
WIS: 13
CHA: 12

Let’s do this shit:

Favorite breakfast cereal
What you’re listening to now

I want to see if there’s a correlation.

Raisin Bran Crunch
Anamanaguchi

Every eight days: 2×1 deadlift (dropset), then either lateral raises or incline press for 2×1 (also dropset.)

Maintenance on my favorites while I diet down. Nothing fancy.

>CAPTCHA: had, joy

You might be one of those who think MBTI is a pseudo-science, but there is one thing you cannot deny: It’s fun. So let’s find out what type dominates this board.

My prediction is INFP!

Also. To make it more literary related, in addition to your type and thoughts, tell us what your favourite novel is too.
http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/JTypes2.asp

ISFJ, which apparently Nicholas II of Russia was… so I like that.

Favorite book is The Princess Bride.

I present you all on this day a real life character sheet. I had seen it before on here, and never really bothered with it until today.

I know there are a lot of lurkers, like myself that lack the motivation and will to change. I honestly think this will help me, and it can most likely help you.

Enjoy.

True story.

1) Test results from http://www.politicalcompass.org/
2) Nationality.

1.) Economic: 3.38; Society: -2.00
2.) USA (Dutch-Indonesian descent)

Don't really know much of anything about politics. Oh well.

What sort of army would you field against elves, if you were the general of some sort of fantasy kingdom?

Elves defected from the elven tribe I want to destroy.

>CAPTCHA: betraying failure

Aw…

Popularity: 2% [?]

Nothing in the Universe Applies to Me

I wasn’t even trolling this time, guys!

This fellow was flirting with me for probably about… four days. I guess. Yesterday I told him that I thought things were going too fast, and that I’d like him to back up considerably. He seemed to amiably agree, requesting a hard-restart to friends. Great! I can work with that. He’s a reasonable fellow listening to reason! I can SO be friends with that.

Eh-heh. Sure.

So I’ve spent most of today sleeping. I got out of bed quite a bit past noon (I had a workout scheduled for today, but with all the running around and carrying of things I did for mom yesterday, I didn’t get anywhere near enough recuperation and I was just not willing to drug myself through a four-hour depletion workout. I took most of today reconfiguring the next few weeks into being a different workout setup now that I’ve mostly-recovered from Summerfest binging. Then I had dinner with mom and watched Still Walking with her, a great little Japanese slice-of-life flick that…)

…my point is I haven’t been checking my phone today. Haven’t been doing much on the computer other than referencing dietary stuff.

I just checked my phone when this fellow AIM’d me. He pretty obviously implied that I’d been ignoring him, yet the only text I’d gotten was a “Where are you?” about an hour or so ago.

(11:25:47 PM) Matte: I love being ignored
(11:26:03 PM) Eric: Cool. I’ll do that then.

Sarcasm isn’t lost on me, folks. I’m very reflective.

(11:26:13 PM) Matte: Even though I did nothing to you?
(11:26:14 PM) Matte: Nice
(11:26:27 PM) Matte: Way to be rude

…Right.

(11:26:45 PM) Matte: Not only are you a coward then, you also have zero social skills
(11:27:11 PM) Matte: Because all I ever wanted to do was be friends and you’re responding with this kind of abuse
(11:27:12 PM) Matte: =\
(11:27:22 PM) Eric: Abuse? Touchy.
(11:27:29 PM) Matte: What would you call it then

I was going to say ‘neglect,’ but that’s a passive form of abuse. So I let it slide. I didn’t directly contradict his usage here anyway, just jabbed him for being… touchy.

(11:27:30 PM) Matte: ?
(11:27:37 PM) Matte: I’ve done nothing to you but be nice
(11:27:38 PM) Matte: =]
(11:27:46 PM) Eric: I’ve not done anything at all.
(11:27:53 PM) Matte: Mhmm, indeed you have

Indeed I have or have not done something?

(11:28:10 PM) Matte: You’re obviously upset with me for some reason

This wouldn’t have been true if he hadn’t said it. Really. I wasn’t upset with him.

(11:28:16 PM) Eric: Huh?
(11:28:30 PM) Matte: You haven’t talked to me at all since the other night
(11:28:35 PM) Eric: What’s your point?
(11:28:35 PM) Matte: On purpose
(11:28:42 PM) Matte: You’re avoiding me
(11:28:48 PM) Matte: And you have no reason to
(11:30:05 PM) Matte: For someone who tries to so hard to be in control of his emotions, you certainly are very out of touch with them =\

Alex was better at psycho-analyzing me. I had no reason to avoid him, and I wasn’t. Now I do, and am. Way to win that one, buddy.

(11:30:05 PM) Eric: I haven’t avoided you. I wouldn’t have you unblocked on my buddy list if I was avoiding you. I would have removed you from our social sites if I was avoiding you. I’m aware I have zero social skills, and as such, I lack capacity for thought-out spite-induced dedicated neglect.

The last sentence is a blatant lie, but everything before that was true when I said it.

(11:30:55 PM) Eric: I’m not in control of anything. I’m not in touch with my emotions on purpose.
(11:31:04 PM) Matte: That’s a severe weakness
(11:31:17 PM) Eric: That doesn’t bother me.
(11:31:21 PM) Matte: You would do well for yourself to remedy that
(11:31:27 PM) Eric: I’m alright.
(11:31:32 PM) Matte: Are not
(11:31:33 PM) Matte: =]

I don’t like people who use emoticons ironically. Hipster trash.

(11:31:51 PM) Eric: If it means I get into paranoid fits whenever someone doesn’t respond to me, I’ll pass.
(11:32:16 PM) Matte: The fact that you would even say that makes me even more right
(11:32:23 PM) Matte: And proves how socially retarded you are
(11:32:37 PM) Eric: I don’t care if you’re right. That wasn’t the point I was making.
(11:32:43 PM) Matte: You have a point?
(11:32:46 PM) Matte: Get to it then
(11:32:58 PM) Eric: Go away. I’m not avoiding you, I just have better things to do.

What is the point of proving what a retard I am? Troll alert.

(11:33:08 PM) Matte: What are you being so hostile for?
(11:33:32 PM) Eric: You wanted me to get to the point. It just seems hostile because you don’t like it.
(11:33:40 PM) Matte: No, you’re being hostile
(11:33:50 PM) Matte: And quite rude
(11:33:56 PM) Eric: Then go away.

Seriously. If I’m infringing so heavily upon your well-being by having a life, well… shit man. I’ve been trolled so hard today. Good show.

(11:34:02 PM) Matte: Because you agreed that we were going to start over and try to be friends
(11:34:12 PM) Matte: But obviously you don’t want that
(11:34:19 PM) Matte: So make up your mind, NOW
(11:34:30 PM) Matte: Because I refuse to be jerked around by the likes of you
(11:34:33 PM) Eric: This is how I treat my friends. They realize I have a life, that I do other things than talk to only them, and they wait.
(11:35:00 PM) Eric: You don’t. And I don’t have time for you if you’re going to whine to me.
(11:35:14 PM) Eric: So knock it off or I will be consciously avoiding you.
(11:35:25 PM) Matte: I’ll do whatever the fuck I please
(11:35:30 PM) Eric: Then good day, sir.
(11:35:34 PM) Matte: No rules in any universe exist that apply to me
Matte is typing…

You are now blocking Matte.

Aw, crap man. I blocked him too fast. Oops.

You know, as much as I want to say he was a troll, he really doesn’t quite earn the honor. He’s a queen. The vast majority of gay men that I’ve flirted/dated have been enormously pleasant, even if it didn’t work out for us. This boy was angry and wanted to project his frustrations on me for being another one of his failures.

That sucks, ya’ll.

I didn’t set out to troll him, and I almost believe he wasn’t trying to inflict harm on me.

Almost.

Popularity: 1% [?]

Jealous Bitching

It’s all a choice.

I have no sympathy or patience for people who can’t control themselves. One way or the other. Anorexic or obese, they are both irresponsible.

It’s not even just a matter of “wanting” it enough, it’s letting yourself be motivated to act in a way reflecting that desire. Being covetous gets you nowhere. Achieve something…. See More

I’ve been on both ends of the spectrum. It’s nothing monumental to let it go “too far” and make it appear that you have a problem to people who don’t have the same motivation.

Obsessed is a word lazy people use to describe the motivated.

I wrote that for a friend on Facebook who mentioned something about anorexia. Watched something on TV about it I guess. She doesn’t seem like she’s anywhere near considering it for herself, but, it’s an issue I’m fairly familiar with and experienced in dealing with it. Not just myself either.

I’ve been involved in a number of pro-ana communities over the years. Do I advocate “picking it up” as a means to lose weight to impress people? No. Not at all. I support people who have already made the decision on their own. There are people out there who are going to do what they are going to do regardless of how good of a hypnotistical brainscrubber you trot yourself to be.

I’m there for THEM.

Anybody willing to effort a change in themselves, to set their goals and do their damn-best-they-can to achieve them is someone I’ll support. I don’t care if there are oodles of established medical records espousing their methods as dangerous or unhealthy. If safe and healthy were a part of their goal, it would be built into their method.

Like it is with mine.

But I won’t villainize anyone for doing differently. There are folks out there losing weight doing their six meals a day, people out there starving themselves, people out there on the treadmill or in the swimming pool all day long running themselves into shallow graves. Bless them all. Fucking dedicated.

And all anyone else does is bitch.

Jealous?

Popularity: 1% [?]

Happy Princess (P1C2B2)

Went to the gym yesterday morning, finally having a dollar for the soda machine.

Fucker was shut off. Logic’d my way into walking across the parking structure under the assumption that, hey, they probably have these for fuckers heading to work. Bam. There it is.

Dollar was too crinkly. I smooth it several times before hoping I have a dollar in my wallet. I try THAT dollar, twice, before the machine lolquits at me (the dollar-accepting thing turns off if you try too many times to prevent sodahax.)

Top floor of parking structure is the one that leads to my gym. I give up my sodaquest and take this loop-way of getting to the gym. There’s one soda machine on this leg of the journey, and it too is shut down.

I make my way in, put my bag on a chair, and dig out my keys (login badge thing is on it) front desk lady is ALWAYS unfailingly nice to me. She asks me how I’m doing and I lie blatantly. She says she’s doing good too.

In the locker room. I’m already wearing gym clothes so I simply deposit my bag. I get some nail clippers out, clipping nails at a counter. I finish, I hear my phone, I go back to the locker. Check messages, okay whatever, back to the counter…

WHEN SUDDENLY, A DOUCHE APPEARS:

D- “Are you going to pick those up?”
Me- “…Why, do you need a snack?”
D- “That’s disgusting.”
Me- “Don’t judge me by what YOU put in YOUR mouth.”
Another guy comes into the locker room, puts a shaker-bottle thing on the counter, goes to his locker.
D- “Don’t use that counter, this kid put his nails all over it.”
Me- “Nevermind that bro, this old fart leaves cocks in his mouth and forgets to swallow.” I sweep the nails into a trash bin that’s put under the counter FOR THIS REASON “Are we happy, princess?”

I got shitty looks from him for the next hour or two I was in the gym.

Day was significantly improved.

Workout B2 for Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Romanian Deadlift

1. 45lbs x 5
2. 70 x 3
3. 90 x 2
4. 115 x 3
5. 110 x 3
6. 105 x 3

5% drops from top set because I didn’t want to increase reps from set to set. Took a note that I was stepping forward to rack the weight with my left foot.

Pulldown

1. 40lbs x 5
2. 55 x 3
3. 75 x 2
4. 95 x 4
5. 85 x 5
6. 75 x 6

10% drops, since this exercise is a 4-6 rep range anyway.

Lateral Raise Machine

1. 30lbs x 5
2. 45 x 3
3. 60 x 2
4. 75 x 4
5. 65 x 5
6. 55 x 6

10% drops, which are HUGE here since I round up. It’s supposed to be a back-off day.

Torso Rotation Machine

1. 30lbs x 5
2. 45 x 3
3. 60 x 2
4. 75 x 4
5. 65 x 7
6. 55 x 10

I actually had this load setup for doing weighted crunches, but I felt myself in a twisty mood. My obliques haven’t been worked lately and I was surprised that I just-as-barely got through them without altering the weights. 15% drops are harder to manage with such low weights. I piled on reps which, in retrospect, is an ass-backwards way of tackling that problem.

Cardio: 20 minutes, 3 incline/ 3.3mph; Heart Rate @ 135bpm @ finish. The ceiling is 150bpm so I can keep increasing the speed… whenever I manage 40 minutes.

Weight: 162lbs.

I was going to test body composition by the personal trainer dwarf snatched up the handzapper. So I’m going to save that for Monday.

Also Monday: I will be deciding how I’m going to progress with this diet. It’s been two cycles, so roughly four weeks. Typically I see folks have their diet phases lasting anywhere from 4-8 weeks unless they’re horrifyingly fatassed. I’m going to fast tomorrow and do some carb-depletion stuff over the weekend to try and dry-out before measuring on Monday.

Body Fat Percentage Results

• 13%+: I’m just going to continue the diet for another cycle. No-prob-bro.
• 11 – 13%: Diet break for one training cycle, then continue the diet and training as I have been.
• <11%: Diet break for one training cycle, then I’m going change everything around to resemble Ultimate Diet 2.

I’ll probably round the results down if I have a convincing decimal or something, but that’s generally where my mind’s at.

Popularity: 1% [?]

Stormy Troll

Oooh boy! It’s been a while hasn’t it, folks?

Well I’ve just been trolled, and I’m here to share! I’m not an actor, if you’re rich, and my lack of celeb-trivia is testament to the fact!

(Formatting added for emphasis, everything was plain-text in chat.)

[10:35pm] Stormy Day:
hi there
[10:36pm] Eric Komans:
Howdy.
[10:37pm] Stormy Day:
so where u from love lol
[10:37pm] Eric Komans:
Cedarburg Wisconsin, dear!
[10:38pm] Stormy Day:
im from wisconsin
when im home that is lol
[10:38pm] Eric Komans:
Same here
[10:39pm] Stormy Day:
im in Brazil right now for work
[10:40pm] Eric Komans:
I’m scrounging up to head back to LA in February.
[10:40pm] Stormy Day:
y to LA
[10:40pm] Eric Komans:
I’m an actor.

And so it begins.

Read the rest of this entry »

Popularity: 1% [?]

Shit Hard

ITT: Why we train.
1) To be more like Batman. Pic Related.
2) To increase chances of survival in zombie apocalypse.
3) To be different from all the fat people in the world.

I like to shit hard.

I mean, I don’t mind when I shit soft, but I like to squat deep and crunch my abs in the bathroom and SCREAM. Just hollar out blood-curling yelps of agony as I fully assault the cauldron with my shitblasts.

Before I trained I would get tired, my legs would quiver and I’d soon find myself seated. No longer. Now I strut into the women’s bathroom (male here) and kick open a stall and just SHIT. I fucking wreck a toilet. You know how sometimes you lean too far forward while shitting explosively that it pellets the entire back of the bowl?

I put my feet on the seat and I spray the WALL. I get the back of the toilet, all over the handle and shit. God damn. I don’t even wipe.

I piss on the toilet paper.

Then I walk out of there, I don’t put my pants back on. I’m layered in my own shit from the hips down and I can’t be getting that in my pants. So what I do is, what I do is I go in to the mens bathroom and I squat (second set) into the sink.

I run some hot water over my buttcrack to rinse off my butt hairs. But I also get some paper towel, and I clean up the other poopsplats that rebounded onto my ankles and such.

That’s what I train for.

Popularity: 1% [?]

not meaning faggot like a dicksucker

So every once in a while I find someone who isn’t quite pleased with the way I behave.

I think we all know somebody like this.

Fortunately, I didn’t have to deal with this person myself. This person was amongst the legion of libelous lunatics linked to L.

Granted, these folks have their share of legitimate accusations. But he doesn’t, which makes him a curious annoyance. Before she decided that she hated me, L’s mother talked to me on the phone once. (And by that I mean “one time” as opposed to “once upon a time.” A single conversation.) She told me this particular son of hers worked in a field with some synergy to my own. I’m a film actor, he is a producer of some sort. Music videos I think she said. I later recall some nonsense about him using his littler-than-the-one-I’m-banging sister for a horror film.

Okay cool. Whatever. But cool. Mom’s trying to establish some sort of common ground to get me to lower my defenses and TALK to her, which I needed and was more clever of her than was probably intentional, but it gave me a reason to add the bastard on Facebook later.

I should note that I have never actually spoken to this guy. All I know about him was the aforementioned film interest, and that he was going to let my girl L live with him to get away from mom when she was old enough to do so.

So basically, until today, a guy I had just assumed was a chill chap confirmed his complete cretinism. An unfortunate disorder, surely:

Kau, kid. I can’t handle that Eric (sp?) kid anymore. For some reason he ended up as my friend and his weird gay shit is pissing me off. You can do what you want, but honestly, if I saw that kid, no teeth. Ever. Sorry kid. Lova ya.

Now, not meaning faggot like a dicksucker. That doesn’t really bother me. He’s just a fag. Major douchenozzle. Waste of space. Sorry if you like him, but damn, he’s the antithesis of a man.

-Jo

He didn’t say this to me, naturally, because he’s a nigger. Now, not meaning nigger like a black person. That doesn’t really bother me. He’s just a jerk. Major picklesniffer. Waste of time. Sorry if you like him, but damn, he actually thinks homosexuality is an insult.

All complaints regarding my personality are of course forwarded to my secretary of slanderous shit. In this case that person was our mutual relation, who graciously defended me:

Ok. 1: You didn’t have to accept the [friend] request! 2. Shut the fuck up about calling people names. Touch him and I will never speak to you again. I’ve tolerated it up to now and enough is enough. I’m sick of everyone bringing him up like that. Forget he ever exists, do something so I don’t have to hear this bullshit and the same goes with talking to him.

If I find you you are talking to him I won’t speak to you. Your immaturity towards this is nonsense.

-L

She’s just great. I love that gal. For all the shit she puts up with just for liking me, she doesn’t seem to place any blame on me and stands by what she believes is true.

That’s a woman, damn it.

Take notes.

I was going to do this whole "Silver Surfer kissing Nova" thing, but I wasn't bald enough.

Popularity: 1% [?]

Jesus Isn’t Even Born Yet

(21:13:41) Jasmine: hi ^^
(21:13:47) Eric: hi
(21:14:53) Jasmine: how are you ^^?
(21:15:31) Eric: relatively okay
(21:15:57) Jasmine: good to know  how was ur day?
(21:16:51) Eric: shit.
(21:17:15) Jasmine: what happend :(
(21:17:20) Jasmine: *hugs you*
(21:18:29) Eric: Gym closed early.
(21:18:47) Jasmine: ?
(21:19:15) Jasmine: is that all?
You are now blocking Jasmine

Stephanie: you dont have to work out every day eric
Eric: No shit. Have I EVER in the past five months that we’ve talked had two days consecutive of working out?
Eric: DON’T BOTHER CHECKING, THE ANSWER IS NO.
Stephanie: well whats the problem then?
Eric: I work out Mondays and Thursdays, and thanks to Christmas wankery, I don’t get to the gym again until Sunday at the earliest.
Stephanie: so go sunday?
Eric: What’s the day after Sunday, again?
Stephanie: the 28th?
You are now blocking Stephanie

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