feels so good man

Posted: December 1st, 2010 | Author: ERIC | Filed under: Chat, lulz | Tags: axe, books, Boston, cast, Chuck Mangione, Disney, DOMS, douchebags, enchant, feels so good, fingerpicking, freaks and geeks, gunpoint, hot Eric-on-Eric action, man, Phillip, plate, postcoital, princes, quote, rape, sensitive, shit, shonen, sitcom, stacked, ten word story, The Princess Bride, The Temple of Gold, total party kill, Twin Peaks, William Goldman, wiping | No Comments »

I didn’t want to go with, but we all died.

I had two stacked, so I just used both since they’re by the same author:

“he was determined,”
“streets of Boston,”

(William Goldman: The Princess Bride; The Temple of Gold, respectively.)

So answer me this: If you are heading for battle and can chose one weapon and one armor set, which ones would you chose and why?

Axe and plate, sell plate, enchant axe with armor money.

Halberd and plate, sell both, buy spell components.

I wasn’t told what class I’m playing, I don’t want to buy spell components if I can’t cast anything y’know?

That’s a little too real-life for me.

If you could turn an American TV show into anime, which one would it be?

Twin Peaks.

Maybe Freaks & Geeks.

Holy shit. I am my own sitcom/shōnen series cast.

being fit is kinda gay sometimes chunky friends will compare our arms and mine is like in inch bigger then his he says “not bad considering i dont work out huh?” i tell him part of the size of his arm is fat he gets pissed off and tells me to stop being cocky then skinny friends try and brag about there fatless body then they get pissed when i say they are also muscleless wtf? /fit/ should i just get ing shape friends?

tl;dr- why are fat/really skinny people sensitive douches?

If you never experience DOMS, your pain threshold never goes up, and silly things like WORDS hurt.

A nigger points a gun at you in an alley and forces you to have sex with one Disney prince/Hero

who would you choose?

BREAKING IT DOWN BY ROWS:

Eric > Aladdin

Naveen < Shang

Phillip > Tarzan (I LOVE Tarzan; I HATE dreadlocks. Sorry!)

Charming < Adam (since he’s not in Beastmode…)

Zyzz > Tiny [but both are disqualified]

ROUND TWO:

Eric > Shang

Phillip > Adam

Eric and Shang are, I think, pretty evenly matched. Eric has definitely ACCOMPLISHED more, and is prettier. And he didn’t totally beta-out when he found out his chick was a fish, either. Shang flipped shit when he found out his mancrush was a reverse-trap. Sad.

Phillip don’t take shit from sorceresses. Adam can’t say the same. Failure. (Adam would have been a better match-up with Tarzan, since they both fucked up bravado men-of-action. Adam would still lose, though. Tarzan wrestle gorilla, Tarzan stylin’ on Beast.)

FINAL ROUND:

Eric > Phillip

I love Maleficent. I really do. But she just does not hold a candle to the stage presence of Ursula. And that’s really how their respective battles looked: Phillip is on a stage, we see the two great powers (jealousy and true love) clash, and a power move wins the day.

While Prince Eric has clearly just gotten off a Die Hard kick. He’s on a boat and doesn’t afraid of anything. Only Hercules had foes in greater scale (and number of them, at that) but Eric hasn’t got any powers and sorely-limited magical assistance, just a couple levels in Badass and Refusal To Take Shit perks.

I’d tap that.

I want to know how YOU clean yourself after a bowel movement.

Do you use TP, damp TP, soap, a bidet/sprayer, etc.

As well as wiping technique, standing/sitting, folded/wadded, do you clean inside, and so on.

I just use my fingers, digging in with whichever finger I’ve extracted my fingernail from that halfmonth and circling in either a clockwise (left hand) or counter-clockwise (right hand) motion to scrape the inside of my anus with my finger.

Then I curl the finger slightly and extract the scraped-wall shit and either flick it into the toilet, if it doesn’t just slide down into my palm, or scrape it on the underside of the seat. I lift the seat somewhat to allow more storage space. I squat.

It helps me to remember to wash my hands before I leave, though sometimes I use the sink to wash out my butthole (same procedure only now with slightly warm water), and in those cases I’m tired of using the sink after all that work and I just leave it like that.

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DOMS Day

Posted: December 27th, 2009 | Author: ERIC | Filed under: Body | Tags: abs, Alec Baldwin, Alton Brown, Artesia, bench, Body, calf raise, carbs, Christmas, crunch, curl, DOMS, dumbbell, fat, fly, Gunnerkrigg Court, horizontal row, lateral raise, Love and Rockets, nauseous, nautilus, partitioning magic, pecs, Pee Wee, puke, pushdown, short shorts, squats, strength, sweaty fucking prick, Ultimatum, vertigo, volume, vomit, weight, Zombies vs. Robots | No Comments »

I had a pretty long workout yesterday. I was tired when I got home, and though I stayed up rather late I wanted to enjoy some non-DOMS time. I knew as soon as I woke up I’d be sore and ache all over. I am.

From a pure-strength perspective, yesterday’s workout was a little… meh. I still had a belly full of Christmas foods, and I think this compromised my benching form. When I activated my pecs I think it interacted unfavorably with this food, and I subconsciously began benching with my arms. It wasn’t until my second set of incline benches (incline bench is always where I really start to feel my chest anyway) that I realized my elbows were tucking in. I dropped the weight and did a third set and deliberately jutted my elbows out. I felt like an idiot for not having caught this sooner.

Wasted session.

After the strength maintenance work I went about the depletion routine. I’ve been eating a lot of carbs in the latter half of the week (though surprisingly few at the beginning of, which nearly balances me calorically.) I either wanted to burn the sugar already saturating my muscles, or I hoped that if I hadn’t fully digested all of that food yet that I could get some tardy partitioning on my side.

Onto the numbers:

Body Weight: 159lbs
Body Fat%: 18.6% (fully loaded; still made me a little grouchy with myself.)

Flat Bench

1. 45lbs. x  5
2. 60lbs. x 4
3. 80lbs. x 2 (machine) ~ end of warm-up
4. 100lbs. x 3 (machine)
5. 95lbs. x 1

I moved to the machine because the first two warm-ups seemed unusually difficult. I attribute this to lack of adequate rest between warm-ups which I ordinarily afford myself. Lack of patience lead to lack of reps, though I did hit my goal of three reps on the top set. My elbows always do what they’re supposed to on the machines but I had two major problems which led me back to the bar for the final set: hand spacing is horrendous/hurts my wrists; nasty sweaty prick stole the machine while I was getting a drink of water.

He was really gross. He didn’t offer to let me work in or anything, and I probably would have barfed on him if he had. Ugh. He came over while I was using it, asked me how long I had on it (“about three more sets, I just got here”) and after one set I put my workout log on the seat and went to the nearest water fountain to sip some water. Come back, he’s dripping all over the seat. Notebook’s on the floor. I grab my book, snicker at his calves, and go back to the floor.

Incline Bench

1. 85lbs. x 4
2. 70lbs. x 5
3. 65lbs. x 5

The top set I arguably shortchanged myself on. I don’t know where the failure was coming from, arms or chest (I didn’t know under stress of the bar, I didn’t think about it on the spot while I was writing in the log, and I can’t remember besides) but I could have probably screamed out a fifth rep on the top set. I had a lot more working out to do, and my goal was 4 reps for today, so I just left it to that.

Second set, as I said, was the “oh shit I’ve been doing it wrong” set, verified by the light final set I used solely to check form. I’m a doofus.

Incline Fly

25lbs. x 4, 4, 2

Nothing changed from last week.

I didn’t have my glasses on, so I got to play “who’s that look like?“:

• Had Alton Brown doing strict curls and rear lateral raises
• Pee-Wee Power Curls (with calf raise)
• My ex standing above my head (if you look at the mirror from the bench I was on) doing whatever she was doing. She had cool yellow short shorts, though, so I knew it wasn’t actually the ex. Still couldn’t look at her directly though. MIRRORS ONLY, COWARD!

Nautilus Abs

3 x 5 @ 60lbs.

I checked the other machine, it’s a “Life Fitness” brand ab worker. I love my gym. It has abs, biceps, and triceps in its own “wing” of the gym, near the pool, squash, and basketball courts. It’s also the closest section of machines (though to be fair it has benches with the vertical handles so you can do reverse crunches, and a mat with medicine balls) to the locker rooms. Presumably so you can pump up your abs/guns and run to the mirrors/pool as quickly as possible.

Speaking of, still playing the celebrity lookalike game: Alec Baldwin was doing some combination of limited ROM shoulder press + tricep extension with a cable machine, further down the line than the Life Fitness ab destructinator.

Oh, and I finally heard that “Poker Face” song while I was working abs. I was not amused. But, abs were the only thing I progressed on for-reals this session. So whatever.

RELATIVELY HIGH VOLUME TIME, GOOO~!

Round One

1. Horizontal Row: 3 x 15 @ 45lbs.
2. Dumbbell Lateral Raise: 13 @ 10lbs; 2 x 15 @ 5lbs.
3. Squats: 3 x 15 @ 45lbs.
4. Standing Calf Raise Machine: 3 x 15 @ 30lbs.
5. Dumbbell Curl: 2 x 15 @ 8lbs. (Pee Wee came by and did his power curls to show me how to lift 65lbs. Thanks bro. This weight was perfect for me, though.)
6. Cable Tricep Pushdowns (w/rope): 2 x 15 @ 30lbs. (Could have done 35, but probably not 40lbs., but the station didn’t have 5lbs. jumps.)

7 minute rest. Each numbered item was done straight through, so all the rows and then all the raises, and then all the squats, etc. 30-60 seconds between sets, no more than 2 minutes between exercises.

Round Two

1. Horizontal Row: 3 x 15 @ 45lbs.
2. Squats: 2 x 15 @ 45lbs.
3. Calf Raise: 3 x 15 @ 30lbs.

My shoulders are fried. I was starting to feel mighty nauseous before my second set of squats this round, and on the ninth rep vertigo hit me. I completed the set but decided not to risk a final one.

Overall, it was a good workout. Took me a total of about three hours to complete. Went to Barnes & Noble afterward and read some comics for a few hours. My arms were all pumped, and it turns out I have traps. I got some interesting looks when I took my coat off. Should have worn a bigger shirt.

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