p.i.n.k Training

So I got a call a few days ago informing me of a fitting the first week of January for a fashion show in Milwaukee on the 9th.

So that means low-carb dieting for the next two weeks, and no enjoyment of Christmas meals whatsoever! Yay!

I was going to do some depletion work today, but since I only had 2 hours to workout, I essentially only had time for my usual routine. My weight is the same, but my body fat percentage mysteriously went down. I’m calling a fluke, since I’ve only started low-carbing TODAY. Yesterday I had nearly 300g.

Numbers time.

Post-workout and post-post-workout meal. I didn't even bother posing correctly.

Weight: 160lbs.
BF%: 16.2% (I check it three times…)

Deadlift

1. 200lbs. x 5 (LO)
2. 180lbs. x 5 (LU)

Fuck yes. That is all.

Lat Pulldown

1. 50lbs. x 5
2. 75lbs. x 5
3. 100lbs. x 3
4. 85lbs. x 5

I don’t feel like I activate my lats properly when I’m chinning, so I’m doing underhanded pulldowns. I’m definitely feeling my lats right now.

I didn’t load properly, though. I put the same amount as I would have offset on the chin assist, so for that reason what you’re ACTUALLY seeing is my warm-up lifts. I would be lifting 100lbs. (offset would thus be 60lbs.) on my third and final warm-up set. I knew this was going to be a lot harder than usual when I completed my first warm-up. I should have listened to myself, but part of me was thinking I was just coming off my high from making my reps in deadlift 45 seconds ago, so I carried on. (I also activated more of my mid-back on DL than I was anticipating. This scared me because I didn’t realize what was happening when I did it and it sounded like a couple ribs popped. But no pain, no injury.)

When my third warm-up set was as difficult as it was, I stopped it there, and called that my effective top-set for this workout. I moved a plate lower for a conservative deload, and got my reps there. Next workout I will see if a full rest before the 100lbs. combined with adaptations will allow me to get my reps. I’m not holding my breath though, I’ll likely be pretty depleted by the time that workout rolls around.

Horizontal Row

1. 80lbs. x 5
2. 80lbs. x 4
3. 80lbs. x 4

First set, again, felt like I wasn’t as strong as I should have been, but again I made the excuse that my previous exercise impacted me too much. This time, a little bit more of a legitimate excuse. My lats were genuinely exhausted for a change, and like I said, DL hit my mid-back for once. However, I was feeling some tightness in my shoulder, so during my rest before my second set I sauntered over to the dumbbell area and grabbed the broomstick to do some shoulder dislocations and watched the aerobics class.

Second set went much better, despite not getting all the reps. Technique felt cleaner.

Third set, no complaints, I failed on my fifth-rep attempt and slownegged it back.

Cable Crunch Nautilus Ab Thingy

3 sets of 5 @ 55lbs.

I gotta say, as far as goofy-lookin’ ab machines go, Nautilus felt like I was getting a decent range of motion on them. I don’t remember the brand-name of the one next to it, but I’d used it before, and it felt like such a stunted “I’m hurling now” jerky motion that I didn’t mind trying something new.

The reason I didn’t do cable crunches? Triceps aren’t strong enough to push down 55lbs. apparently. Oh well.

Chatted with Andy a bit following this, he seemed interested in my dieting history and the genesis of my intense interest in fitness and why I don’t already have the results I’m clearly so motivated to achieve. I felt they were honest and worthwhile questions to answer, so I did. Might write a post about it, but I’ll save it for when I’ve achieved. No sense in writing another “but this time it’s different!” until I AM different.

Plus I need to find all my fat kid pictures.

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She Grabs My Ass and I Deload

Body Weight: 161lbs.
Body Fat Percentage: 18%

Flat Bench:

1. 100lbs. x 2 (and 3 assisted…)
2. 90lbs. x 5 (+)

Incline Bench:

1. 80lbs. x 5 (+)
2. 65lbs. x 5 (+)

Incline Fly:

1. 25lbs. x 4
2. 25lbs. x 4
3. 25lbs. x 2

Plus sign means “increase next workout.” Just trying some easier notation for myself.

Now I get a little volume-bonkers.

Horizontal Row: 6×12 @ 40lbs. (+)

Lateral Raise: 2×12; 1×6 @ 10lbs. DBs

Squat: 1×12 @ 45lbs.

[WE INTERRUPT THIS PROGRAM]

Bicep Curl: 2×12 @ 5lbs. DBs (+)

Triceps Pushdown: 2×12 @ 30lbs. cable (+)

Cable Crunches: 6×12 @ 30lbs. (+)

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It’s All In The Wrists

Well I just got home from lunch with pops, who picked me up from the gym.

I had an apple and a protein bar pre-workout. Probably close to 300kcal.

Getting Right to It:

This is the first time I've been sub-18% in over a year.

Body Weight: 159lbs.
Fat %: 17.7%

Fat Weight: 28.143lbs.
Lean Mass: 130.857

Deadlift:

1. 1×4 @ 200lbs. (LU)
2. 1×4 @ 180lbs. (LO)

Getting there. Next week should be my last at 200lbs, haha! Following this, a personal trainer I had never met before (Andy, in case I mention him in the future) seemed interested in my program. He wasn’t trying to shove a new program down my throat, so we were able to talk for a bit.

And then he taught me how to power clean. I have a new friend.

Chin Ass:

1. 1×2 @ 124lbs. lifted (35 off)
2. 1×5 @ 99lbs. lifted (60 off; going to increase this set next workout)

Horizontal Row:
3×5 @ 75lbs. ~ Getting increased again next workout.

Cable Crunch:
3×5 @ 50lbs. ~ Increasing next workout as well.

Big ol’ carby meal PWO: Bagel in the car (plain, just wanted some fast carbs because I was feeling light-headed… very glad I brought it with me); swiss steak with mashed potato and corn at the restaurant. Today’s maintenance day, though, and so I still have enough calories for dinner!

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Upper/Lower Body Split

Ughhh…

I feel like I’m speaking heresy. But I’m “using a four-day upper/lower body split, in combination with an hour of cardio daily, to lose fat.”

It’s in quotes so people can mock me when I go back to a pure workout for real men.

Today I found out I can’t make PRs in squats and deadlifts after four days of low-carb/low-calorie dieting. Who knew?

Stats
Total Weight: 164lbs.
BF%: 17.8
Fat: 29.192lbs.
LBM: 134.808lbs.

Today was a… lower body… legs day… UGH THIS SOUNDS SO STUPID.

Squats: 1 x 5 @ 200lbs.
Deadlifts: 1 x 2 @ 170lbs. (failed to lift 205lbs workset)
Hack Squat: 1 x 5 @ 45lbs. (first time doing this)
Leg Curl: 1 x 5 @ 75lbs. (making up for FAILURE deadlifts, only not really, surprisingly painful)

I did five minutes on a treadmill before I remembered the walk I have to do tomorrow. Love ya Sarah!

Some more rage: I’ve lost less than a pound of fat per month for the last three months.

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Full-Belly Workouts

I think I should stop having a bowl of oatmeal before I workout. It’s fucking up my bodyfat readings. Not to say I’m NOT a lardass, but the meter is essentially laughing at me as hard as I was laughed at in middle school. It saddens me.

10/8/09
Deadlift – 1 x 1 @ 195lbs. (left hand under, after failing a right-under of 205lbs.)
Bench – 1 x 4 @ 95lbs.

So next workout I bump up the Deadlift and Bench stays the same.

BW: 171lbs.
Fat%: 19.3lbs. (33lbs.)

10/14/09
Squat – 1 x 5 @ 195lbs.
Press – 1 x 2 @ 70lbs. (FUCK!)
HamChin – 1 x 5 @ 55lbs. offset (114lbs lifted; since I’m the same weight I was the last time I attempted this lift, I got the final rep I wanted, yay!)

Weight: 169lbs.
Fat%: 22.8% (38.5lbs)

See, this is why I shouldn’t eat a big bowl of oats before a workout. Not only when I breathe deep do my lungs expand fully, push down my organs, and make me feel like I should shit right there in the squat rack, but it bumps my bodyfat up too! Waah! I don’t really know how to do the math for this! So I gained nearly six pounds of fat and lost… seven and a half pounds of muscle. What the fuck? /sarcasm

At any rate, I need to get my diet in order. I think I’m going to change to something a little more staggered, where the majority of my calories are eaten on training days. I know that retained water artificially inflates my bodyfat “score” but I’m not going to be doing any bizarre glyco-deplete bullshit until at least a month from now.

Invoking Katch-McArdle: 370 + (21.6 x 58.725) = 1638

Multiplied by an activity factor of 1.375 leads me to 2252 calories for daily maintenance.  Suddenly the weight gain doesn’t seem so implausible =\

Anyway, I’m going to be eating at maintenance on training days ONLY, and dropping to 30% of that on days I don’t train. As much as I hate to diet by percent, I’m going to just for the sake of daily adjustments/sanity. Fat/carbs/protein; 20/50/30.

Using today as an example: I eat as close to 2252 calories as I can without going over and with getting at least 169g protein.

Tomorrow, I’ll assume nothing has changed, and use “yesterday” values: 2252 – 30% = 1576, with 118g protein and 197g carbs.

And then Friday I go to the gym again, so I’ll re-weigh and re-measure accordingly. I’m going to try to go in without a carb meal (maybe just some eggs or a proshake or something), it won’t fully deplete me or anything but I hope to get a more accurate reading nonetheless. Then I’ll use that to calculate for that day, which will be hard to manage if I don’t get to my dad’s house for fooding up, and then for the low days following all the way to Monday.

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Training Update

I’ve been forgetting to update the blog, but I haven’t been forgetting to workout. Because I’m not gay.

9/25/09
Squat: 1 x 3 @ 170lbs.
Press 1 x 5 @ 65lbs.
HamChin: 1 x 5 @ 60lbs. offset (I don’t know how much I weighed this day, scale was DISAPPEAR)

10/2/09 – First Workout @ L.A. Fitness
Squat: 3 x 5 @ 185lbs. (almost failed the very last rep, BUT I DIDN’T)
Bench: 2 x 5 @ 80lbs. (also did 1×1@85, before these two sets)
Deadlift: 3 x 1 @ 185lbs. (need chalk, need big socks, form, etc.)

Weight: 168lbs.
Bodyfat: 17.4%

10/6/09
Squat: 1 x 4 @ 195lbs. (failed my 5th rep, looks like another week until 200, FUCK!)
Press: 1 x 2 @ 70lbs. (this exercise: I really miss having a mirror to check form it; felt like my abs were cleaning my pelvis)
HamChin: 1 x 4 @ 55lbs. offset (I almost want to count the 5th rep, I just SO SLIGHTLY missed it, but again: Not a faggot.)

Weight: 169lbs.
Bodyfat: 20.1% – disregarded; carb-loaded

HIGHLIGHTS

Gym Salesman “This is the squat machine–”
Me “Machine? No.”
GS “I know you said you don’t like machines, but in case you injure yourself–”
Me “I’ll wait on it and go back to the rack when I’m healed.”
GS “Okay, but when you squat, it puts pressure on your knees?”
Me “…Yes. [suspicious]”
GS “Right, when you squat down and your knee goes past your foot, you put tremendous pressure on your knee. This machine allows you to squat without that pressure, so you can keep squatting when your knees are sore.”
Me “I just squat with proper form and avoid this issue entirely.”

GS “So today’s Friday and you’re doing squats, so you probably aren’t benching today, but here are where the benches ARE.”
Me “So I see… what makes you think I’m not benching today?” (refer to my workout schedule above)
GS “A lot of people have their ‘chest day’ on Monday.”
Me “Oh, right. I forgot about that…”
GS “When’s your chest day?”
Me “The day I work my chest.”
GS “…”

So next to me, this black curlmonkey starts doing his barbell curls in the other squat rack. Fine, whatever, I only need one squat rack until I’m superhuman so I just rest it up while I watch him do push-curls (like a push press, only with curling… that uh.. sort of… “put your hips and back and drop your head into your shoulder blades like you’re about to cum” way of curling.) I look at his notebook and notice that this Friday, Mr. Monkey is hitting his biceps from all angles.

Monkey “You gots a notebook too?”
Me “A-yup.”
Monkey “Dats cool bro, you gotta keep track yo shit.”
Me “Shore do.”
Monkey “I do so many sometimes I fergit.”
Me “So many what?”
Monkey “Uh [checks notebook] …curls.”

Golden.

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Birthday Goal

Goal Statement: By my 20th birthday I will have visible abs.

Start: July 27th, 2009
Deadline: January 27th, 2010

Measurements

• Height: 5′ 9″
• Weight: 163.8lbs.
• Upper Arms (mid-bicep): 10.5″ (both arms)
• Waist: 33.5″; 34″; 35.75″ (two inches above; at; and two inches below navel)
• Hips: 38.75″
• Thighs: 24.5″; 25″ (right/left, measured directly below buttocks)
• Body Fat Percentage: 19.5%

Specifics

• 1400-1500 calories per day
• 6 meals per day
  1. Breakfast (320 calories): Bagel with slice of lowfat cheese
  2. Snack (140 calories): Protein shake
  3. Lunch (300 calories): Turkey on whole wheat with light mayo
  4. Snack (140 calories): Another protein shake
  5. Dinner (300 calories): Microwaveable meal
  6. Snack (180 calories): Protein bar
• Drink 1 to 2 gallons of ice-cold water per day
• Workouts are brief and intense, 1 set of 8-12 for the following exercises:
  1. Crunch
  2. Leg Curl
  3. Leg Extension
  4. Palms-up Pulldown
  5. Bench Press
  6. Oblique Crunch

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